A Showcase of the Self

It's been awhile...

2007-08-06T13:11:00.000+10:00

Yes, it has been some time since I last posted anything. Looking back at all my previous posts, I realise that things have changed a lot (and I do mean A LOT!) since then.

For one, I've got a new housemate and we get along well. Secondly, Sundae is now under the care of a 'kuai low' family - we can't bring her back to Malaysia! Sob! I've also completed my Masters and am currently unemployed (er, I'm actually selling handphones for Three but I'm just going to ignore that bit!). Oh yes, there's also that bit where he proposed and I said yes! So I am officially 'booked for life! Yay!

So there. That about sums up the going-ons in my life since I got my Dopod last year. Want a more detailed version? Email me. My inbox has been awfully empty as of late. Hehe.

Erin's getting a new toy!

2006-10-14T22:06:00.000+10:00

Guess what? Erin's getting a new toy! Woo hoo!

*jumps around merrily!*

Check it out: http://www.dopodasia.com/Dopod/Singapore/En/Products/PDAPhone/838Pro/

That's it. Updates on everything else will be up after my exams. I know, I know, it's long overdue. But who cares? Do you?

Anywaaaaaaaay, *in sing-song voice* I'm getting a new toy! I'm getting a new toy! New toy! Yay! Arriving on Wednesday. Can't wait! Weeee!~

Fiji appetizer...

2006-09-06T10:26:00.000+10:00

I'm baaaaaaaaaack!

Going to be a lil' busy typing up a report of the trip, preparing for an exam and spending time with my mum (who'll be visiting soon, yay!) - so to keep things short and sweet, Fiji was wonderful! Aside from the non-stop seminars, the bit of 'free time' we had was filled with lots of sun, sand and sea!

This post is just to whet the appetites of those who have been bugging me about the trip (although I suspect they're just hunting for souvenirs!). Hehe. Will post pictures, and give a more detailed account of a the trip when I'm up to it!~

Til then, here are two words I learnt whilst on the trip!

Bula (pronounce 'Mbu-la') - Hello, or a general way of greeting someone. Use it when you see someone you know/don't know/want to know/don't want to know or simply because you feel like yelling something. I found myself stuttering the word (and looking dazed and confused as everyone and I mean everyone 'bula-ed' me!) on the first day. But by the end of day two, I was 'bula-ing' my way through everything! If you're planning a trip to Fiji anytime soon, this word is a must-learn!

Vinaka (pronounced 'Vee-na-ka') - It simply means, 'Thank you'.

P/S: Anyone has a bottle of 'Fair & Lovely' to spare? *e-hem* You know what I mean....

Why so?

2006-08-06T16:11:00.000+10:00

A couple of days ago, a friend (on MSN) asked, "Why does your blog simply narrate the going-ons in your life, but very little about your inner thoughts and feelings?"

Stunned, I simply answered, "Lazy-lah! Have to think about how I feel...ish!"

Nonetheless, after that conversation, I felt a teeny-weeny bit bothered. Have I been doing that? Rather detached posts? Rarely expressing my innermost thoughts and feelings?

It must be true. After all, someone did point it out.

I guess the problem lies in my pride - the side of me that doesn't want to be seen as vulnerable.

If my blog were an anonymous one, I wouldn't give a donkey's tail who came and read the 'inner' me. But it's not. Hence, I can't truly express what I feel, what I want, what I dislike or even the ever-changing wave of emotions that bombard me everyday.

It's sad, I know.

Maybe, just maybe, one day when I feel a lil' bit braver, I'll let you catch a glimpse of the 'real' me...

Like, d-uh...

2006-08-02T23:51:00.000+10:00

THE STAR, August 2, 2006.

The Prime Minister has issued a warning – those who spread untruths and slander on the Internet will face the law.

If information in blogs, websites and online portals were incorrect, bordered on slander, caused disturbance or compelled the public to lose faith in the nation’s economic policies, their authors would be detained for investigation, said Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi.

“We cannot allow such matters to flow through uncontrolled,” he told newsmen after attending a briefing on the proposed Islamic Civilisation Park in Pulau Wan Man here.

“They say all kinds of things, make all kinds of dubious claims. We cannot allow them to abuse the freedom earned under the media. If left alone, they can say or pass on all kinds of things.”

Abdullah also said that those who sent out such information via short message system (SMS) would also be held accountable.

“If they abuse the freedom – more than the present freedom given without any restriction – we cannot allow it,” he declared.

“Where in the world is there such a freedom, where one can freely spread incorrect information and slander without having to own up to it?”

Answer: The Internet. D-uh.

Strange but true...

2006-07-26T00:52:00.000+10:00

Ever get the feeling that something’s not right, but you can’t prove it?

I’m not exactly sure if my nagging thoughts are on the mark, but recently I’ve started suspecting that my doggy is being framed. Oh sure, call me paranoid, but I know my Sundae. She may be a mutt at times and dig up the trash or tear my undies to bits, but she definitely does not have a shoe, scarf or pen fetish! Furthermore, she’s a quick learner. Whack her thoroughly once and she’ll more often than not, stay away from that item – forever!

So, what is a doggy owner to think when strange things start occurring? Shoes get bitten (all of a sudden!), scarves are torn and a pen (in a nice UNMOVED pen holder) is crushed to itsy-bitsy pieces? Definitely yau keng-kuang (something fishy in Cantonese).

You see, if those things were destroyed under normal circumstances, I’d be alright. I’d whack Sundae ‘til her butt aches and nag her about boundaries. But they weren’t.

What makes me so certain? Elementary, dear Watson. Elementary.

Last night, upon my return I noticed that Sundae had attempted to ‘de-ball’ my scarf. She had pulled the strands off the end of my scarf which was in a shape of a fluffy ball. Minor damage done since I could push them back into place. I hit her hard, placed the damaged scarf in her face and left it there, basically for her to contemplate the graveness of her actions. Result? No more playing with that particular scarf for Sundae.

Today, to prevent a similar episode from occurring, I placed the damaged scarf and the ball’s filling on a high, narrow table which is beyond Sundae’s reach (the same table I put food stuff, and other fragile items). Not only is that table beyond her reach, it’s also quite wobbly which makes it hard for her to TRY to leap on it without me finding out. And so, I left the house with a sense of assurance – Sundae’s been whacked and has learnt her lesson, scarf is safely beyond her reach.

Lo and behold, when I got home today, the scarf and the wool filling Sundae had pulled out last night was all over the floor. I confronted the only person who was home, I’ll call him Kawan Serumah (what a coincidence for him to run out of his room the moment I came back!) who in turn blamed poor Sundae.

I was adamant. There was no way on earth Sundae could have gotten on that table unless, as Ed sarcastically pointed out, she sprouted wings and flew! AND, if she had dragged the scarf down after stretching her body a few inches longer, the filling she tore out the night before would be at the foot of the table and not at the other end of the room. ALSO, why would my dog place the rest of the scarf on my chair? The response I got, “I don’t know how, but unfortunately she did! I’m sure!”

I was and am furious. How dare he blame my dog. Things are beginning to add up. Not the first weird thing he’s done or said. Hmmph, why do such a mean thing? Jealously? Doesn’t he know that a dog is a man’s best friend?

Random thoughts...

2006-07-20T13:55:00.000+10:00

Semester break just ended and I miss it already. Sigh.

The hols were pretty good. Didn't do any of the things I planned to do (go camping, visit Sydney, finish off a series of anime, get a part-time job, sleep in late...) but it was still wonderful. Spent time getting to know some people from church, played poker, watched movies, cooked, cleaned, shopped, hung out...you know, the usual.

Class on Tuesday was pretty interesting. It was nice being the one in 'the know', instead of the this-is-my-first-sem-and-I-have-no-idea-what-I'm-doing-here student. For those who I have yet to inform, I'll be going on a course-required trip to Fiji in August. Funnily, I feel a little anxious bout the trip. Weird huh? Most would jump at the chance to take such a trip (a holiday cum learning experience paid for by my parents!) and yet, here I am feeling all worried at the thought of having to travel semi-solo (1 week with coursemates and the other alone). Maybe it's because I've never done anything like this before. Staying at a backpackers' lodge, finding my own transportation, travelling from island to island....alone!?!?! Also, when all's said and done, this trip is assessed ie. I have to be on proper professional behaviour at all times! I have to ask the right questions, do the right kind of research, give valuable input and suggestions to government officials, mind you and among all the 'buat pandai angmoh' students, I have to 'buat even more pandai'! Furthermore, when the trip ends (I'll be off on the 21st of August and back on the 4th of September), I'll be required to submit a 2000 word review of the trip (12th Sept), sit for a 2 hour paper on the subject (12th Sept) and complete a 5500 word research essay (17th Sept). And what about my other subject? I am so dead.

Now that I've got those negative thoughts off my chest, let me just say that I can't wait to head off to Fiji! Woo hoo! The academic trip basically starts on the 24th of August and ends on the 30th of August. That means, I have 7 blissful days on a vacation island in the middle of cold winter here in Melbourne, all to myself (and the occupants & visitors of the island that is!). How great is that?

Besides my trip to Fiji, I've also been looking for a part-time job. I have too much time on my hands! Well, not exactly. If I were to be a model student and follow the unit guide and spend 5 hours of preparation a day for each subject, I would have virtually no time to live, let alone look for a job. I'm not exactly going all out in this search, but rather it's a 'come what may' attitude. I'll just answer a few ads here and there and see what happens. I'll be fine either way.

Er...yeah....that's it.

How to cure World Cup fever...

2006-07-02T08:45:00.000+10:00

Some claim that there is no cure to ‘The Fever’. I, on the other hand, beg to differ. There is a cure. And I have found such a cure. A real, effective, will-definitely-snap-you-out-of-it cure. In fact, it’s available to everyone! Anyone with a hardcore case of World Cup Fever and wishes to relieve themselves of it can try it. It’s real simple. I promise.

However, there is one catch. To rid yourself of this sleep-in-the-day-constantly-log-online-for-latest-World-Cup-news-eat-lots-of-supper-consume-barrels-of-alchohol-and-put-on-lots-of-weight-fever, you have to be prepared to feel an enormous ache in your heart.

Why, you ask? Cause that’s the way it’s got to be. I’ve tried the cure, and believe me, it is effective. But then again, I must have received a double dosage of the cure as I still feel an achy feeling in my heart - as though something is squeezing it hard and is trying to shove it up through my esophagus and up into my mouth.

So, how does this cure work? Simple. First, you’ve got to pick yourself a team (I was more or less forced to pick England as GSF would kill me otherwise!). Call it, your ‘Dream Team’. Then, you have friendly arguments with your friends about how your ‘Dream Team’ will trash theirs. After a couple of sessions or so of friendly bantering, it is time to bid your team up against theirs. Where better to do this than during a World Cup match on your telly (unless of course you’re loaded and are watching the matches live in Germany!)? Watch your ‘Dream Team’ score goals, beat its opponents and make it to the final 8! Cheer them on! Make bets! Assure other fans that your ‘Dream Team’ has a fair chance of making it into the finals. In fact, tell everyone you know that you are certain your ‘Dream Team’ will emerge the champions!

Finding it easy so far? Well, this is where it gets a little tougher…

The final process of the cure is probably the simplest to achived but hardest to accept – watch your ‘Dream Team’ get trashed. Sob. Sob. Yes, you read it right. Watch them get trashed.

If that doesn’t work, immediately pick another team and call it ‘Dream Team 2’ (Who better, than the 'then-reigning' champions, Brazil?). Repeat the above (obviously with more speed!). Then, watch as ‘Dream Team 2’ also gets whacked out of World Cup. Sob. Sob. Uh-huh, go through the heartached...again.

If this doesn’t turn you off World Cup for at least 4 years, you are incurable! Don't even bother looking for a cure, cause there's none for people like you! You probably relish in any loss or win! Hmmph!

For those of you who are lucky enough to have picked winning teams or the champion-to-be of World Cup 2006, I have only this to say to you, ‘you don’t need to be cured, but watch your back in 2010!’

How to deal with World Cup fever...

2006-06-19T04:17:00.000+10:00

I’ve never been a big fan of soccer. In fact, I think I spent the better part of my life laughing and belittling those who claim they suffer from ‘football fever’. For me, it’s always been that clichéd argument – it’s stupid to watch 22 grown men chasing after a puny ball – that is, until I met the ‘Greatest Soccer Fan’ personified.

Ask him the name of any player from any country and 8/10 times he can rattle off a bunch of stats, name you the team the player’s from, quote you a list of headlines and probably even tell you the exact price of that player’s jersey on E-bay. Yes, the GSF eats, breathes and lives for soccer.

How does GSF’s girlfriend deal with a chronic case of ‘World Cup-is-on-I-can’t-be-too-bothered-with-you-fever’? Simple. She hangs around the GSF, rubs herself against him, eats off his plate and soon enough, she’s got the fever too!

So, if you don’t see any new posts til after the World Cup, you’ll know where I am – in front of the TV, sitting at the edge of my couch, screaming my lungs out at a lousy call and sharing midnight snacks and high fives with the GSF!

Yippee-dee-doo!

2006-06-11T01:44:00.000+10:00

One semester down. Phew.

If I make the grade (60%), I'll be on to my next semester headed towards a Master in Tourism. If I don't, then it's a Postgraduate Diploma and a lifetime's worth of, 'I knew I should have shoved you out on your ass!'. Oh well...atleast its over, for now.

Hmm, so how does one entertain herself while everyone else is still preoccupied with exam preparations?

Let's see...

I could cook.

Or clean.

Maybe re-organize my wardrobe?

Do some shopping, perhaps?

Learn the lyrics to that Chinese song I so like?

Sleep?

Teach Sundae a new trick?

Hmm...decisions, decisions.

Oooh! I have a thought...I don't care! I'm on holiday!

Ahhhhh, I just love the 'post-exam' period.

Is life so black and white?

2006-05-26T00:08:00.000+10:00

Do girls have to act 'like girls' and boys 'like boys'? Who defined 'like girls' and 'like boys'?

Is it a must to give your other half something romantic on his/her birthday? Something handmade and 'from the heart'? Who defined 'from the heart'?

Is life so black and white?

Counting my losses.

2006-05-14T23:17:00.000+10:00

I've never been so angry in my life.

Not even when my bro burnt me with a firecracker (on purpose, mind you!). Not even when my dad falsely accused me of breaking the door knob (didn't speak to him for a week!). Not even when a lame-ass driver tore off the front bumper of my car due to reckless driving (I screamed bloody hell that day!). Not even when my Maths teacher forced me to re-copy a whole section of an exercise book (I threw the book in his face!). Nope. I've never felt this angry before.

To think that just a couple of weeks ago, I had decided to forgive them. Forgive them for the inconvenience they put me through. For the lack of sensitivity on their part. For their ungratefulness. For their lack of 'people skills'. For being born into this world.

Well, it seems like that thought has been thrown into the abyss along with my Mr.Nice-Guy attitude. No more, no more Mr.Nice-Guy. Let's face it, some people just don't deserve the grace and mercy you bestow upon them. Some just need to be lifted by the collar, shaken, tossed around, held upside down by their toes, dunked into a filthy toilet bowl and smacked around hard by the back of a shovel! Yes, some just don't appreciate Mr.Nice Guy.

If that's the way they want it, so be it! As long as I don't get my money back, I am one unhappy woman! Although I've not been rejected in love, I can assure you, I am right up there with the scorned woman! Hell hath seen no fury like mine! If they want to be such calculative, conniving, ungrateful SOBs, then I'm definitely going to calculate everything to the very last cent! I wish they'd just stop mucking around like a bunch of pathetic low-lifes and pay up!

And when I get that feeling...

2006-05-09T14:47:00.000+10:00

I hate that feeling! The one where I'm enjoying myself and yet in that same wonderful moment, I feel a great sense of guilt.

There I was, laughing, watching a stupidly hillarious anime and all of a sudden, boom! This annoying, nagging voice in my head goes, "Shouldn't you be studying? Your exam's tomorrow!"

True...but....

"No buts! If you don't study, you're never going to pass this exam!

But...but...there's only...*mental calculation*...3 chapters left!

"So finish it!"

5 more episodes?

"No!"

3 more?

"No!"

Hey! Cut me some slack here!

"No!"

Er..how about after this blog entry?

"Keep it short!"

Sigh. I hate you voice-in-my-head-cum-guilt-aka-the-kiasu-side-of-me!

Pfffffttt....

Ugh.

2006-05-01T03:23:00.000+10:00

It's that time of the year again.

Assignments pile up, exams loom ahead, and due dates seem so near, yet far enough to make the whole process torturous.

Sigh.

10th May - ATD4010 Exam

11th May - ATD 4010 Assignment Draft 1

14th May - ATD 4120 Assignment Draft 1

17th May - ATD 4010 Interview Session 2

18th May - ATD 4120 Assignment Draft 2

19th May - ATD 4120 Presentation

20th May - ATD 4120 Assignment Final Draft

22nd May - ATD 4120 Assignment Due

27th May - ATD 4010 Assignment Draft 2

29th May - ATD 4010 Assignment Final Draft

31st May - ATD 4010 Assignment Due

9th June - ATD 4120 Exam

"When I can't,

that's when He does his best work!"

Look how far we've come...

2006-04-30T02:31:00.000+10:00

"You’re still the one I run to

The one that I belong to

You’re still the one I want for life

You’re still the one that I love

The only one I dream of

You’re still the one I kiss good night

Still the one..."

Dinner for two...

From him...

From me...

Mission failed.

2006-04-23T02:31:00.000+10:00

As next week will be our 3rd year anniversary, I decided to get a lil' something for Ed. After all, I think he's gotten pretty tired of the 'love dockets' and 'IOUs' I've been giving him for the past 2 years.

So today, I told Ed that during our 2 hour shopping session in Chadstone after lunch, he and I should split up. He with his mum, and I with SH and B.

The night before, I had already planned my gift for him - a ring! He's been bugging me for over a year now to get him a one. I've been postponing it because there has never been a right moment. Normally, he shadows me wherever I go, or is somewhere nearby. Hence, never an opportune moment to 'surprise' him with one.

Anyhoo, we finally made it to Chadstone and for the very first time (ok, I might be exaggerating here!), I was free of his presence! Feeling an unusual sense of liberation, I plodded around after SH and B as they ushered me to a couple of shops which sold men's accessories.

After browsing through a range of rings, we (although they weren't much help as they said 'ok' to virtually everything!) agreed on one. Happily, I fished out my purse, pulled out my card and was about to pay for the ring when it happened!

I felt a pair of arms circling my waist and a very, very familiar voice cheekily saying, "Hmm, what are you all doing, huh?"

Shocked and slightly annoyed, I tried my best to save the situation (and face!) by muttering, "B is buying something for AM!"

Duh! It didn't take him long to figure out that we were standing at the men's ring section.

Sigh.

Oh well, atleast I got him the ring AND he got to try it on for size.

In B's words, "Mission failed!"

All good. All good.

2006-04-18T22:05:00.000+10:00

***Read the below only if you want to bore yourself. It's mainly directed to those who have been pestering me to give them an update on my life***

I'm finally on my long-deserved Easter break. Have been struggling hard this semester cause the course I chose (Master of Tourism) isn't what I expected it to be ie. not at all fun OR about travelling! Haha! Nah, I knew what it entailed but I guess it's really different from what I did in my previous course. Anyhoo, I'm handling it well and am lovin' the stress (yeah right!)

Ed's mum is also here to visit, so we've been out almost everyday from morn til night. Also, I think I've put on a bit of weight since she arrived - there's always good food! She'll be leaving this Sunday, so hopefully, with the looming exams and assignments, I should be able to lose the weight I've gained. Besides that, I've also spent a great amount of time getting to know her better which is "wonderful, wonderful" (private joke).

And finally, for those of you who have been bombarding me with questions on why I've moved, here's the short version of it: Housemates sucked, finally free! Haha! Nah, don't want to get into the whole crappy story over the net, but the bottom line of this move is...it's good and I'm happy. Now the house is always clean and always neat! It's also more spacious than the previous place cause there's only two rooms but it's around the same size.

Although I did feel a lil' pissed off at the start of the year, I soon came to realise that God always, always has a plan. He never leaves us out in the cold and always blesses us with friends to help us along! He's been great to me spiritually, emotionally, mentally, financially and e-hem, physically! Haha!

Thanks for the prayers and the concern you guys showed me while I was 'homeless'. And an extra special thank you goes out to the occupants of 2/13 Dennis St! Although you guys suck at times (haha!), you guys are the best (awww...).

Will post some pics when free. And yes, I know I didn't post up the pics of my Gold Coast trip last year, the various restaurants I tried, my birthday pics, and the pics of cute Sundae. Will do it soon...promise!

A Tale of Two Tales...

2006-04-05T03:08:00.000+10:00

Need to share this!

Two er, rather interesting things happened today. Well, not interesting per se, but rather...funny? Amusing? You be the judge!

-------

After reading PP's entry 'Manager Chin', I copied her post and sent it via MSN to Ed. He read it, made no comment and returned to work. Slightly annoyed, I asked, "Did you read it?" The reply? A short, curt "Yeah".

Hours later, during our midnight snacking session, I confessed to him that I was tired of doing my assignments and just wanted to sleep.

Read the following conversation that took place:

Me: Tired la! Don't wanna do assignment! Wanna sleeeeeeeep!

Ed: Sleep la. Wake up and continue later...

Me: Cannot la, feeling guilty....

Ed: Guilty ah? Ok then, I sentence you to 3 hours of beauty sleep!

Me: *suspicious smile*

Ed: See, I can be cute too!

Aiyoyo!

-------

While doing my assignment, I started feeling a wee bit bored. So as usual, I dug up some food. In this instance, it was a small jar of Nutella. Anyhoo, after a couple of hours of eating and typing, I decided to take a break and walk around the house for a bit. Together, Ed and I made our way to the living room (which is a distance from where we study). Normally, Sundae would bounce up eagerly and trail us, but oddly, this time she didn't. We cajoled her for sometime and finally gave up, telling ourselves that she was probably tired.

After a couple of minutes in the living room, Ed suddenly said, "Eh, cannot be la! She must be up to something!"

True enough, as soon as we rushed back to the study area, we saw the lil' monkey standing on my desk, about to stick her snout into my tiny jar of Nutella.

Smart lil' fella, huh? Sheesh!

Not true, BB!

2006-04-02T23:30:00.000+10:00

Haven't checked in for oh-so-long!

A ka-zillion things have changed since the last time I blogged.

Don't worry, this is not going to be one of my 'lame-ass-let-me-update-you' entries. In fact, I don't even feel like saying much! The only reason I'm actually typing something, is cause my lovely friend BB has publicly announced that I've abandoned my blog. So not true!

Once my assignments are over, I promise you the longest 'lame-ass-let-me-update-you' entry you've ever seen!

Til then...

Toodles!

1.5 years, 32 degrees, Rm200...

2005-11-02T16:33:00.000+11:00

2 days left before the last assignment of my undergrad degree is due. Once that's over and done with, I'll officially become a non-student (that is, if I pass everything!). I'm still having doubts about becoming a non-student. As far as I can see, it isn't much fun. There's the work, the expectations, the self-support, the sleeping before 11 and waking up before 8, the routine and oh, did I mention the work?

So do I want to become a non-student? Well...not for another 1.5 years! I've decided to do a postgrad in Monash. Haven't told the parents but they should be fine. Have been dropping hints so this shouldn't come as a shock to them, I hope!

---------

The weather is totally killing me. For the past two days, it's been at 32 degrees. Can't bear it any longer. Need air conditioning. Have been trying to finish up my assignment, but my brain's all fried up. No longer funtioning. Am currently sipping on a cold Fanta, but still feeling parched and dry. Pup's panting away. Sigh.

---------

Can't wait to go back to Malaysia. Will be back for a couple of months. Doubt I'll be doing much since I'll probably spend most of my time up in Genting. Have been offered an intership there. Allowance is lousy (RM200), but atleast they're not charging me for the experience. Miss my bro and Ahma. Also miss my Satay and Bak Kua. Aiseh...rindu!

Along came a spider...

2005-10-27T22:29:00.000+10:00

When was the last time I posted something? A long time ago.

Do I have anything interesting to say? Maybe.

What is it about? One of my biggest fears.

Huh? Let me explain.

I'm sure most of you know that I honestly love the guy in my life, right? After all, as everyone has remarked (time and time again), he is one of the few Nice Guys left on the face of the planet. I'm lucky I managed to snag one, eh? *grin*

Anyhoo, nice as he may be, he is still a guy. I'm not sure if I'm just paranoid, or being influenced by the movies or brain-washed by gender studies, I have a deep and recurring fear that I'll wake up one day to find him in the arms of another woman. Am I being silly? Maybe.

Recently, his friends have been teasing him about another girl. A so called 'yi lai' (mistress). You would think that he'd deny it with all the strength he could muster right? Not a chance. Instead, each time he just smiles and gives a half-hearted, 'No-la...'

What am I to think? Furthermore, this 'yi lai' has been bombarding him with sms-es, MSN messages, and phone calls which he happily receives.

What hurt me most was the fact that he laughed at one of her messages (which I did not find particularly funny). The kind of laugh I haven't heard in a while. The laugh that says, 'Aww' and 'She's so cute' all at one go.

Still think I'm being silly?

I've tried (and am trying) to be nicer, more attentive, more supportive...only to be brushed aside. Maybe he's busy with his exams? Who knows. I surely don't, seeing that he hasn't told me anything recently. How can one week make such a difference?

Everyone thinks we are the perfect couple. I still think so. I'm hoping it's just a phase...We've been through patches like this before, only there was always just the two of us. Now there's her. The spider I'd like to crush.

It just hurts so bad that I've got to let it out...

Casablanca...

2005-10-06T02:04:00.000+10:00

I guess there're many broken hearts in Casablanca

You know I've never really been there so I don't know

I guess our love story will never be seen on the big wide silver screen

But it hurt just as bad when I had to watch you go

The song has been playing repeatedly on Ed's comp. Not sure why its on, but he left without turning it off.

So here I am. Alone.

Why didn't I go out with Ed and the rest? Cause I'm feverish and struggling with assignments.

Why didn't he stay? Cause I told him to go.

Did I want him to stay? I don't know.

How do I feel? Teary. Disappointed. Dead.

Maybe the fever's playing with my emotions.

Sigh.

It's been a while...

2005-10-03T00:10:00.000+10:00

Wow! Haven't blogged in some time.

Let's see, I'll try to think back as far as possible and summarize each event into a couple of lines. Here goes!

1. Bought a new racquet - 3 weeks ago.

Impulsively purchased the latest racquet from Yonex. Nanospeed 7000. Realised much, much later that it was way above my budget. Decided that parents should pay for it, seeing that it was my first ever sports equipment.

2. Caught a cold - 2 weeks ago.

Had a very bad cold. It came with the works - flu, headache, backache, fever, cough and sorethroat. Ed suggested that I sweat it out with a game badminton. Felt worse after that. Had 2 assignments and 2 presentations due that week. Managed to submit everything on time. Croaked my way through the presentation. All good.

3. Supported Ed - 1 and 1/2 weeks ago.

Supported Ed during his badminton competition. He played really well, but alas, only managed to be 2nd runner up. Am still very proud!

4. Went back to Adelaide - 1 week ago.

Rested in Adelaide for a week. Was really enjoyable. Spent time with Mum & Dad. Ate heaps, flew kites, did some gardening, and played ping pong. Left reluctantly.

5. Doing last minute work - currently.

The hols have finally come to an end. No more lounging around. No more bumming. Time to get serious! I've got loads of assignments due. Am no where near getting started. Will start borrowing books tomorrow. Tonight, I'll just concentrate on my debate summary. Sigh!

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In other news, sources have revealed that a certain someone has been spotted cozying up to another certain someone. Although both deny a relationship of any sort, mutual friends of both parties say otherwise. When questioned, one close friend reported that male someone and female someone spent the night together. Other witnesses have confirmed that an extra mattress was found in the room of the male someone.

~~Speculation has it that male someone and female someone have hooked up. As no official announcement has been made yet, bets are still accepted. Odds are as follows:~~

1 : 3 Already together

1 : 2 Will get together within the next couple of weeks

1 : 5 Will never end up together

1 : 6 Will get together in another 3 months or >

~~Odds will continually be updated to enable you to gauge the relationship's outcome as it progresses! Follow the action as it happens!~~

Note: When the above was blogged, I was in a happy mood, merely teasing the two of them. Seeing that one of them has pissed me off, no more updates will be provided. Am finding it very hard to fall asleep as I don't understand why that someone is blowing things out of proportion. Am thoroughly, thoroughly pissed off. None of us actually care if they get together or not. It won't add to our joy nor sorrow in any way. We're just having a few laughs. Nevertheless, we're curious - if nothing is going on, what's with all the secrecy?

Well, that's one question that remains to be answered.

The bottle broke!

2005-09-08T15:55:00.000+10:00

For the concerned, the curious and those who are purely kepoh, let me tell you the story behind my negative MSN nick (maDCap is pissed off. Who needs friends when all they do is lie?).

It all began last night. What started out as a normal, happy MSN conversation soon turned slightly sour when I found out I'd been blown off by a couple of friends for another person. Fine, so I've been known to exaggerate a teeny bit, but the matter remains : how fair is it to break a promise for a (in my opinion) lame reason?

Here's the scoop. Last month, a bunch of us decided to throw a lil' potluck party during the coming Mooncake Festival. What a great idea right? Food feast and beating the homesick blues all in one go! Anyhoo, Ed and I invited a couple of friends from the city who at that time, EXCITEDLY agreed to turn up. In fact, they even planned the dishes they were bringing and did the usual, "who'll be there?" kinda deal. Boy, were we happy!

However, last night the happiness proved to be short-lived when these couple of friends decided to pull out. Oh, you'd think they'd have a good solid reason for doing so right? But no! They claim, that they just have to attend a birthday party of another friend who seemingly has no friends! What a load of bull! You don't go around agreeing to one thing and then pull out of it for such a lame reason! What's even worse, the guy isn't even their friend (so I'm guessing). He just happens to be a friend of their housemate.

Give me a noble cause or tell me the plain truth. Either would have been better than the stupid reason they attempted to conjure up! Seriously, what a load of bull! If you weren't happy to come down to the suburbs in the first place, don't agree! In future, give a tentative answer or a 'maybe' would have suffice. But no, you go and agree and then change you mind after that.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not upset because they are not turning up. Rather, I'm just totally disappointed in the fact that they found it hard to keep a simple promise or just speak the plain truth.

I'm kind of relieved that I found out from another friend about their change of mind. Else, I'm not sure what would have happened if I'd spoken directly to them. Don't worry, I've cooled down somewhat since then! In the words of my housemate, "Erin, lan cheng!"

Since I've ranted and vented it all out here, I'm feeling heaps better. Oh well, despite what I said last night, and what I said in the above, I guess a friend is a friend is a friend is a friend. I'll probably still forgive them and be all nice, etc. No grudges to be held. Only fond memories. Will still appreciate them despite their absence (for lack of a better word!). Haha! If they happen to read this posting, er, well...just letting you know how I feel!~ *grin*

Hunger, hunger go away!

2005-09-06T16:16:00.000+10:00

Didn't sleep again.

Since I had nothing to do this morning, I went for one of Ed's lectures. It was B-O-R-I-N-G. Spells, Torture. If that wasn't bad enough, I felt particularly hungry this morning. No, let me rephrase that. I was starving (Note: Erin's Dictionary, starving = dead)!

While forcefully willing time to past quicker and in a pathetic attempt to distract myself from the lil' gong fiesta that was going on in my tummy, I actually composed a poem. Sadly, it only took me a lil' under 10 minutes to spew it out (ie. one whole hour of pure boredom after that!).

Anyway, enjoy!

Hunger, hunger go away,

Come again another day.

For today I'm on a Diet,

Leave me be and my tummy quiet.

Hunger, hunger, shoo, shoo, shoo!

To my Diet, I'll stay true.

Gallons of water and tons of fruit,

Making alterations to my birthday suit.

Hunger, hunger please be kind,

Please take leave, give me peace of mind.

I need to persevere and be good,

So please don't let me think of food!

Hunger, hunger, I give up!

Bring on the desserts, give me grub!

So long Diet, I've found a new friend,

So dear readers, this is the end!

On God & Life.

2005-09-05T14:18:00.000+10:00

Updated on 5/9/05 : Best friends forever...

Erin vs. Sandman

2005-09-03T05:22:00.000+10:00

Haven't baked anything in the last couple of days. Been sleeping a whole lot! Although no one seems to agree with me, I've decided that Sundae has a narcotic effect on me! It has to be her! Why else would I be sleeping all day long?

Well, it's a good thing too seeing that the bananas I bought a week ago aren't ripe yet. Been planning to bake this superbly yummy (I am assuming this!) banana chocolate cake but the recipe asks for overripe bananas. Will just have to keep waiting...

I'm in a bit of a daze now. I didn't sleep for 24 hours the day before because I actually thought that it'd be easier to NOT wake up for badminton rather than sleep AND THEN wake up for badminton. Meaning, yesterday morning (or was it this morning?) I played 2 hours worth of badminton without sleeping a wink the night before. When I got back after lunch, I was so pooped out, I couldn't even manage the thought of dragging myself to cell group. Unsurprisingly, I fell asleep on the couch while contemplating the above issue.

Woke up about 4 hours ago (around 1.30am) and have been watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S since then. The pup is asleep. Entertained the thought of waking her up, but decided against it. Hmm...I can safely say I'm bored. Oh well, another couple of hours before I need shower and head for another gruelling 2 hour session of badminton. I must say, I am getting pretty good at it *Grin*

*Yawn* Darn it! I'm getting a wee bit sleepy. If I sleep now, will I wake up for badminton? To sleep or not to sleep? That is most definitely the question...

Warm Tummy, Warm Heart.

2005-08-29T12:03:00.000+10:00

Simple question, what do you get when you squeeze in some golden syrup, toss in a dollop of sour cream and top it off with chocolate?

Answer? The Wonder Cake.

Seriously, that's the label of the recipe! Me being attracted to all things wonderful, obviously could not and did not resist the chance to try the recipe out. After all, the instructions did sound simple. All one had to do was throw in all the ingredients into a food processor, give it a whirr, pour it onto a cake tray, pop it in the oven for about 40 minutes, boil some water, make a cuppa, enjoy the aroma seeping through the oven door, and before you know it, you can cut a slice to accompany your coffee/tea!

Although skeptical, I tried it out anyway.

Surprise, surprise! It really was that simple! Simple AND delicious! What more can one ask for? Definitely a wonder cake.

Besides yet another success in dessert department, I recently got myself a dessert of another kind. Well, she's not a dessert in any way, she's basically just being named after a dessert!

Allow me to introduce you to the new 'manja-pot' in my life, Chocolate Vanilla Sundae! Or for short, Sundae!

I bet my bro is laughing as he's reading this! He has this theory that all my pets are being named after food because food is the ultimate love of my life! Oh well, maybe he's right. But don't you think Sundae is a suitable name for this totally adorable, melt-your-heart, tooth ache-sweet, pup? *grin*

All in Onde!

2005-08-25T22:23:00.000+10:00

Last night's onde onde was an absolute success! Well, most of them anyway. I have to admit that the first couple of balls I rolled looked pretty disastrous. Not only did they look somewhat deformed (just a wee bit!), before I could even dump them into the pot of boiling water, they started leaking! *giggles shyly* Anyhoo, I soon got the hang of it and it was smooth sailing from then on! In total, I made about 30 balls of onde onde! I know, I know, why so few right? Hehe. Well, that's cause I only bought 1 packet of flour! Didn't know that these "lil green balls which go 'chuiiit'" needed so much flour! Hey, don't laugh! It was my first attempt after all (if you don't count the ones I made in Form 1!). Gave some to my neighbours and they loved it! Even requested for more! I am SO pleased with myself! *pats self on back* Oh yeah, did I mention that it was yummy? *reads through* It was super, duper yummy!!! Mmm...

Went for dinner with Ed earlier. Super stuffed, super sleepy! Will give a brief review of this restaurant (along with the others we've been trying recently) when I'm free. As for now...Zzzzz.....

Diet, be gone! Erin's Desserts : Day 1

2005-08-24T21:32:00.000+10:00

Although she'll deny this, I swear it's the truth. It's all Wei Na's fault! Seriously. Remember how I was all gung-ho about dieting yesterday? Well, I can safely say that as for this week, the diet has been put on hold. Why? It is all her fault...

You see, eversince reading her blog a couple of days ago, and talking to my bro on the phone (about her), I've had this sudden unsatiated urge, call it a desire or itch if you want, to stuff myself silly with sweet treats! For the past couple of days, all I can and have been thinking about is her flourless chocolate cake and her spiced-bread-pudding-thinggy! Mmmm...

But alas, left stranded in this sad, lonely, forsaken place, where one is forced to fend for oneself and equipped with absolutely nothing (Fine! So it ain't that bad!), the task of producing such wonderful, heaven-sent goodies is no one's but mine alone! But fear not! For although an amateur, fortunately, I've been blessed with plenty of brains, heaps of innovative cells, a truck load of zealousness and an ever-supporting garbage-gobbling boyfriend!

And so, the first step in ~~world domination~~, er...I mean my first self-taught baking/cooking lesson began last night. After chatting with Wei Na through MSN, I was all pumped up and hence, decided to try baking a cake! It was close to 1 am, mind you. The result? FANTABULOUS! The texture? Perfect! The shape? Perfect! The taste? Wundebar! It was simply...marvelous!

Okay, so the cake came out of a box. Doesn't matter does it? Cause I baked it! In fact, I even added a couple of secret recipes and 'improved' on the recipe quite a bit. Hmmm, not bad. Not bad at all!

Anyway, let's forget about yesterday and focus on tonight. Instead of baking something, I've decided to make onde-onde! Or rather, in my boyfriend's own words, "The lil' green balls which go 'chuiiiiit' when you bite into them!" I thought I'd try something relatively easy before I move on to more complicated goodies! Good idea, eh?

So, there you have it! The reason why I can no longer be on diet. It is all her fault. Had she not made any sweet delights herself, I wouldn't have had the cravings and wouldn't be forced to make (and eat!) all these goodies! You've got to believe me! It's really her fault! Hehe.

Oh well, until I go back to Malaysia in January (and gobble up her sweet treats!), I'll just have to make-do with my own culinary expertise (though non-existent). Hopefully the cravings will be gone after a week! Til then, diet's off! Desserts are in!

Erin's Diet : Day 1

2005-08-23T19:19:00.000+10:00

I'm hungry! I have not eaten at all since I woke up...which wasn't long ago! Haha! Ok, so I'm exaggerating, I had one miserable apple and half a bottle of water about an hour ago while playing badminton (Yes, it's true! I was playing badminton!).

Wondering why? The answer's simple: I'm on a diet! Yes, yes, again!! Haha!!

Last night, while browsing through all the old photos, I realised that I had put on so much weight! Argh! So as for today (No promises!), I've decided to go on a diet! In about 3 minutes, I'll be cooking dinner...and so, since I'm on a diet, my portion of everything will be cut in half!

*lol* Again, let me remind you that I am not making any promises whatsoever! I will remain steadfast until the next chocolate bar whispers my name!

So til' then, wish me luck!

Smartness, smartass...bah!

2005-08-16T23:41:00.000+10:00

I'm so annoyed! Seriously, I am. Argh!!! I hate how people are so quick to judge and immediately conclude that I have it easy cause I study something different from them. This isn't the first time this baseless conclusion has been reached, and I assure you, it probably won't be the last!

Ok, so it's true that my contact hours are like minimal compared to what others have to go through. But so what? That doesn't prove zilch! And what if some of my subjects require me to read magazines, watch TV and appreciate movies? So what? Seriously! It may be a wee bit more fun than what other so-called 'smart' people do, but I doubt that it's any easier! People whojump to such idiotic conclusions on the other hand, know very little. Yes, if you've thought about it before, I'm talking about you!

Why do you do that!?!? Why do you instantly assume that my subject is easy just because I seem to get through it without breaking a sweat!? So what if I don't stress out when assignments are due? Does that mean it's easy? No! That just means that unlike some of you, I know what I can and cannot handle. I know my limits. I know how to time-manage so that I can still have fun, while still be able to do my work! So what if I don't fail my subjects and get distinctions! What? That makes it easy? Has it ever crossed your mind that I may just be smarter than you are!? Or that you just need to work harder!?

Argh! I'm so annoyed! If there are people who think that these subjects are easy, seriously, I dare you to jump off that ridiculously high pedestal and try a couple of these subjects as your electives. If you do get high distinctions, I salute you. If you don't, wipe that smug look off your face with that sore ass of yours, okay? Thanks.

*Not meant to intentionally hurt anyone! If you feel the pain, you've probably made such inane remarks to me. Else, read and leave*

Much 'aduh' about nothing...

2005-08-15T08:36:00.000+10:00

Although not a great reason, I decided to start up another blog cause I wanted to keep one er...'pure'. I needed a blog to just jot down the everyday going-ons in my life - the sick rumours, funny jokes, irritating moments, crappy coincidences, mundane moments and funny fantasies - but didn't have the heart to 'pollute' the other er...more...'serious' blog. Well, not that the other one is at all serious. It's er...ah! Forget it! I'm confusing myself already. Anyhooooooo, the point being, from today onwards, there will be 2 blogs! *applause* This one will be updated regularly, while the other (as explained) will be updated as and when I have really deep (yeah, right!) thoughts on God & Life!

So, what have I been doing since the second semester started? Er, to sum it up briefly, I've been...vegetating! This 'vegetation syndrome' of mine has been SoOooooo bad to the extent that my boyfriend has decided to call me, 'Baby Bok Choy'! I've done absolutely nothing for the past four weeks besides sleep (alot and at peculiar hours!), eat (alot and also at peculiar hours) and watch One Piece (an anime).

This morning, I slept at 7am (I'm assuming because I have this peculiarity of not wanting to know time after 12am!) and just woke up a couple of minutes ago around 3.30pm! My time is so screwed up! Oh well...

Oh yeah! Need to start on assignments soon. Both due on Thurs. Eek, just realised that I've only got 3 days left to do it! Man, I've gotta start changing gears and try chugging up that mountain of life! Btw, for those of you who don't already know it, I don't make much sense and spew out heaps load of BS when I've just woken up (or anytime at all, for that matter!!)

*Yawn* The bed looks so warm and inviting....hmm...maybe another short nap?